California Scheming

I know that I haven’t written anything in a very long time. Life has been crazy, but here are some updates:

1. My parents have abandoned us for the great state of Michigan . They left a couple of weeks ago and are now happily ensconced back home in the Michigan country-side.
2. I really miss my parents.
3. We bought a house!!!
4. The deal on the house seems to have fallen through
5. We’re looking for renters and new babysitters, without really knowing if we’re ever moving.
6. I am very stressed!
7. It was our second anniversary yesterday! I got Shawn a tea-pot. He got me a ring…that I took back. I’m super picky and hard to please. Poor Shawn!
8. Working part-time is the best thing ever. Well, I mean, not working at all and still having money and insurance would actually be the best thing ever…but working part-time is pretty rad.

Dear Ally Lou,

We so wish we could be there with you to celebrate your 5th birthday! We love you and miss you! Have lots of fun today!

Love,

Aunt Balissa, Uncle Shawn, & Pinto Bean

Heather’s St. Patrick’s Day Party

Me and my bonnie lasses

Ummm….I may have had too much to drink…

Yep, that’s Steph humping me…

…the night got a little out of control…

I will neither confirm nor deny that I pulled the shelf above Heather’s toilet off the wall. And I may or may not have tripped (aka drunkenly hurled myself across the room) and fallen on my head. Also, some people are saying that when Stephanie and I were wrestling (yes, wrestling) that she hit her head on Heather’s TV. I really can’t say if any of that’s true. It’s all just speculation at this point.

Happy St. Patrick’s Day!!!!!

You’d be hard-pressed to find someone who’s worse at small talk than me. I just can’t do it. I’ve got nothing….seriously. It’s excruciating for me AND whomever I’m talking to. I find it so damn boring and I just can’t bring myself to torture others with social niceties and minutia about my life. Instead, I usually just listen, smile, and nod… and then try to escape from the conversation. Not very smooth.

I’ve got to pull it together and improve on this because I find that, at work and now that I’m married, I have to engage in this horrible activity pretty frequently. Shawn is great at it. He could make conversation with anyone at any time and he manages to seem genuinely interested in whatever they have to say.

Part of the problem is that I have an exceptionally short attention span, so if you don’t hook me with something hilarious and/or interesting right off the bat, I snooze out on the conversation. Also, I’m the worst actress in the world, so you will quickly note the glassy eyes and the yawning when I’m done with the conversation. PLUS, when it’s my turn to respond, I usually panic, laugh nervously, and flee the scene. I’m a train-wreck.

Ha, I just looked on Amazon and found this: The Fine Art of Small Talk: How to Start a Conversation, Keep It Going, Build Networking Skills — and Leave a Positive Impression! by Debra Fine

I’m not above resorting to this. I’m really not.   

Have you noticed that I barely post anymore? And that when I do post it’s very little writing and mostly pictures? It was so much easier to blog when I was home with the baby. He’d lie down for a nap and I’d use the time to write something. Now that I’m back at work, it’s so much harder to find the time and my life is so monotonous that I feel like I don’t have anything interesting to write about.

I’m hoping that when the job switches over to part-time I’ll feel like I have some free time again. For now, when I’m not at work, I’m trying to get in some quality Noah-time…or I’m sleeping.

Have I mentioned how much I LOVED maternity leave??? I was so productive – I’d go for walks, spend quality time with the baby, the house was clean, I’d write, use the elliptical machine, read tons of books, hang with the girls, etc. Now I’m back to my working self, which means I work, eat, watch movies, and sleep. Boring!!!

But thems the breaks, I suppose. I’ve gotta come up with a get-rich-quick scheme!

I got approval from work to go part-time starting in April!!! AND we still get to keep full benefits! I’m so relieved. I was getting very tense about the idea of leaving Noah with a nanny/sitter for more than 40 hours each week. Now I’ll only be working Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday and will get a nice long weekend with him. Phew that makes this a little easier.

Our RV, where my parents are now spending their winters, is parked in the Cleveland National Forest in the Santa Ana Mountains . Shawn and I LOVE it out there. We’re seriously jealous that my parents get to live in a national forest while we’re stuck in suburbia and we try to head out there for some hiking every weekend. Here are some pictures:

Shawn inside the RV with Noah:

I miss my son SO much. I feel like I never see him anymore. By the time that I get home from work and we have dinner, I have about an hour with him before it’s time for bed. This blows! He’s going to forget who I am!

The good news is that he’s getting to spend a lot of time with his grandparents now and they’re taking great care of him. AND I think I’ve found a nanny for when they head back to Michigan. I’ve had a few nerve-wracking interviews, but we finally found someone who seems to be a good fit. And she lives across the street from us! He’ll start staying with her in April.

Anyway, here are some Noah pictures…

Maternity leave is over. I returned to work yesterday. I HATE having to leave Noah.  I have loved watching him grow over the last few months and it’s been amazing to get to know him. I’m very grateful that I had the time off to spend with him, but I’m very sad that’s it’s over.This is going to be a rough transition.

For a brief and glorious time last year we had a housekeeper. She’d come over and clean while we’d go run errands or go to a movie or to the beach and when we’d get home the house would be sparkling clean. It was amazing!

As many of you know, I’m absolutely obsessed with St. Patrick’s Day. It’s my all time favorite holiday and last year I decided to throw a St. Patty’s party at my place…and I decided to invite the housekeeper. A very bad idea. She came over in the morning on the day of the party and cleaned the house top to bottom. It looked great!

Hours later she showed back up to find the party in full-swing and the house filled with drunken chaos. There was trash and spilled booze everywhere. And anyone who’s ever been around me when I’m drinking heavily knows that I find great pleasure in throwing things when I’m drunk…mainly food…into other people’s mouths…or cleavage. That night, after many Irish Car Bombs, I thought it was a brilliant idea to begin hurling fake chicken bits at all of my guests. While they loved it (I’m sure), the woman who had recently cleaned my house and who was completely sober did not.

Oh! And it turns out that my dear friend Megan has a very interesting “tell” when she finds someone overweight. She will compulsively rub her belly…so anytime she would be talking to the Housekeeper she would start with the belly rubbing. It was way awkward (and totally hilarious).

Poor Housekeeper had spent all morning slaving away on my house only to find all of her hard-work shat upon. And then she was assaulted by the Belly Rubber. Can you imagine that she didn’t want to work for me anymore? Geez some people!